big dog LeDoux


If a picture truly says a thousand words as literature often purports
, then this one screams them at an ungodly hour causing you to never sleep kindly again.

Since we adopted LeDoux i’ve been searching for pictures of him from his past perhaps a puppy photo, but this is what i found. This is the day the rescue picked him up from the Metro in Casper, WY where he sat broken footed and nameless. They’d given up on him and believed no one wanted him, i reckon he was probably going for the chop. Could you imagine? This wonderful big boy to be put down or left to rot in a cage because “no one would want him.”  Well we sure as fuck did. I can’t let my mind wander too far, but imagine all the wonderful big and little and ugly and sweet and good dogs living in kennels or living along the mile waiting for a needle like some convict, all because some ass hat has a brain smaller than a thimble dick. All because they had a bad day, don’t get paid enough or whatever whatever. I don’t care. It’s just a waste of life.

Dude (LeDoux) was originally found stooped against the municipality building with a mangled hind foot. As i’ve previously stated in another post, the rescue couldn’t fix the issue as it had already healed. Now and again he’ll limp but he manages just as easy on three legs as he does on four.

Im so grateful that the rescue picked him up, and that we were able to meet him on a random Saturday (having only made the arrangement Friday night), because i genuinely can’t imagine how much i’d be struggling without him. I can manage alright because i’ve done so for years, but whats a life worth when its scrapes by till it dies and causes loved ones to go unsteady? All negative and nill feeling, dead inside; living only on love when facing it.

I got it good, real good. I married my guardian angel, got the loveliest big dog that does his best and as always im living the dream. Everyday. The rest will settle.

LeDoux safe and sound at the rescue last year.

that friday feeling **video**

Happy Friday!

Heres a video of Boone showing you how he feels about the coming weekend. He is in training at MSER.

I’ve been so busily lately. In working full time and doing a few things for MSER, so i haven’t had a lot of time to blog or vlog. I have a few videos waiting to be created and a couple of etsy projects im working on, all the while im writing away. Hopefully i can find some time this weekend to talk about life in general. Until then, happy weekend!

goodnight bird

Me too, Bird. It’s been a week if its been a day, and we’re all ready for the weekend.
Tonight i had a lovely evening at the rescue, and it’s an early night tonight ready for the Denver Expo tomorrow.
Bird and i bid thee – a goodnight.

This sweet thoroughbred is available for adoption!

my first day at the barn — from last week ** video**

It’s Thursday. A regular Thursday, or perhaps not so regular. As you’ve probably noticed I’ve really been driven to start filming as I go through days and experiences and life troubles. I always felt that the filming was pointless, because it’ll never look as good or as magic as other people’s videos. And then a few days ago I caught myself in the mirror.
My conversation went something like this:
“Bitch what you doing?”
“Uhm, poopin’?”
“Nah, I mean with your damn life. You got two cameras in a bag, and you want to use ‘em, yet you don’t because you know someone will always be better? You know what a writer and clever as you are – you are a damn fool.”
“Could we talk about this perhaps at a time where I ain’t in dire need of wiping my ass?”
“It’s the only time you look at yourself in the mirror kid, Look at yourself and do what you want. Quit beating around and making excuses.”
“Alright.”
“And open the damn window. Smells like somebody died.”

To begin with the filming was to show family at home that I am here, and that I’m not as far away as it feels. Now it’s becoming a creative out let. When I can’t write. I’ll film. When I can’t Act. I’ll film. And I’ll feel Jack smiling at me whilst I sit and edit on the floor in front of our little space heater. Just like he smiles when I sit playing my bass or slide guitar.
Already I feel this filming is taking me to new places and proficiencies. My biggest regret is that I didn’t start it in Texas, when every day was Basil and I talking about everything, talk a foreign walk in dead heat – when things were truly tough but the days were free and beautiful. One thing though, Jack and I are as in love as we’ll ever be, even if we’re missing a piece. A piece that’ll be missing till we one day die too. That’s fine.

As you know I started at this new horse rescue last week, and it all happened like it was meant to be. Everything has been awesome. I’ve been free to film and take pictures. Then today I get a long text message asking me if I would film for them and vlog and help and become a part of something purposeful, something that really means something to me and obviously to me. I about fly down the stairs at work screaming with sheer excitement. That’s something I’d never dared to dream of. How amazing. I truly am so happy right now, today. Tomorrow I might struggle a little again, but that’s how living is. It’s hard, brutal and little drops of hope keep us from dehydration.

Unfortunately due to getting messed up by my job and then other monetary stupidities popping up I’ve had to bail on the farrier class, the one thing I was so desperately looking forward to. One of the main reasons for I came to Wyoming. I haven’t had the heart to email them yet to let them know I’m too damn fucked and too damn poor right now to take the class. Mostly because I don’t want to face it. We often ignore things we can’t bring ourselves to admit. We’re all guilty kids running around lying. I’m very guilty of it and I do it a lot. However, this horse rescue might have my back here. One of the girls, Sarah, has offered to show me what she knows and mentioned knowing someone who is a bare foot trimmer that might need an assistant. You know those people you meet and you just click and things seem good and right? Well I’ve only had that twice or thrice in my life. Jack. Patrick. And my first best friend Jamie Riley — wherever he may be now.

Anyway I’m so over whelmed and humbled. This weekend I’ll actually be taking a trip with the folks at the rescue to Denver, which will be a totally new experience for me. I’ve never been to a horse expo before, but I can’t think of anyone better to go with. Like some hermit crab I actually asked “if I go – I’ll be able to stay with you guys right?” 
That’s how un-used to people I am these days. How unfamiliar I’ve become with how things work. It’s a little pathetic, but I mention it because this is what it’s like moving to new countries. You don’t know what will ridicule you or embarrass you. Jack is the safety blanket I’m very reluctant to let go of incase I get lost. He’s also the one telling me, “You need to go.”
So damn it. This weekend I’m going to Denver… with what people call friends. I cannot wait. I filmed my first day at the barn which was last Saturday. You can find the video below.


Last night I went to start working on an adoption video for sweet Annie, I think we’ll have to do a little more work on the filming because it was crowded and the barn started to look like a giant fart cloud. Sarah also helped me lunge Annie some, which was amazing. I hadn’t done that in 15 years almost and there I was doing it. But my dumb ass was too self-conscious to film it even though my camera was right there.
But next time I will, and you’ll see how happy this country living does me. I might be a western imposter, god love it.