home at last

Well, it’s been a month. A month that felt like hell and high water was kicking me in the lip the whole damn time. Friday was my last day at work, so finally some pressure will be off for a while and thank hell for that. I tell you. Moving during covid, packing the entire house, training LeDoux as well as working full time — utterly overwhelming. And the whole time i just wanted to sleep and write. I don’t think i’ve written properly for a month. I’ve taken notes and had word prose coming out of my ears — why sure. But i haven’t had a novel thought since Laramie. Laramie which seems so far far away now. It already feels so far in the past but it was less than two weeks ago.

Yellow Texas flowers
Fields of flowers.

I didn’t want to leave Wyoming and it’ll always have a place in my heart, as will the Black Hills and the dead gulch of South Dakota, but i was ready to go back to Texas where i can buy my heart full of land to live on. Not wanting to move or pack boxes anymore or live through old furniture that has eight poor-man generations of farts and ugly seeds living in the lining. A new start in an old place with a clear vision ahead and dead reckoning the rest. It’s good to be back.

Palo Duro Canyon, TX

After all these long years out there in the states living and dreaming — we’re finally home in the Lone Star state. It sure is weird to be back. The place has changed a lot and i almost don’t recognise it. I’ve had job interviews, but selfishly i’ve been hoping it’d take a little while for them to get back to me so i have a chance to catch up on a few things. As i said. Friday was my last day working for my job in Laramie, Wy. Covid at least enabled me to keep my job whilst moving and a little thereafter. Everything was sent in, but no one spoke to me for the last week or two. And no thanks or goodbye. Not that i expected any. Riddance and good and feck away. Im glad to be unburdened by it all.

Dog off leash
LeDoux free running like a boss.

I wanted to restart this post once or twice but theres no real way to express learning for the first time what coming home really feels like. My heart pumps in my chest desperately trying not to wake me from my reverie, but im really here. Out in the fields amongst the horses and june bugs zooming at 80miles a minute into my face. Doux running like freedom could lift him. And on top of it all our apartment is ace with a view of the paddocks and outback of  piney bush n’ wood.

Dog and horse communicatin through fence
One of his new best friends.

Returning to Texas was like being welcomed with opens arms and served a dr.pepper in a glass bottle as soon as the welcome sign flew past the window. All that long time no see bullshit but this time it cut me up and i fell head over boots once more for the Lone Star State. Right now im unemployed and the place is settled enough that i hope i can work on my writing again next week. There are a few other ventures im hoping to dip into while i figure out my next steps. Some acting, stand up prospects and filming ideas. I’ve been considering trying to get an acting agent but i don’t if i want to drown myself down in that rabbit hole. I mean, i want to act but i dont know how it all works. Whether i’d need two separate agents for acting and writing. Meh. Time will tell. For now its crap o’clock and all i got is dreaming to do.

my bear flute **video**

So i’ve been keeping this a little under wraps. I was unsure if i’d like to show this part of my life but I’ve wanted to learn to play the flute for many many years, however i couldn’t afford to buy one. Then one day i came home and this bear flute was sitting in a beautifully embroidered sleeve — waiting for me to learn to play it. Immediately i flicked through the book that. came with it and i picked it up pretty well from the beginning. Unfortunately i suddenly got incredibly busy so i set it aside and have recently had the time to pick it up and play.  I’ve learned to play a lot already! I’m really pleased. Its been years since i learned to play the recorder — but this bear flute feels like it was made for me. It has beautiful low tones and just placing it against my lips feels like a gift; the wood having a warm rich taste like a happy whiskey, if such a thing exists.

I hope you enjoy the video, even though it is very short. I hope to make a lot more and longer ones in future, this was a test to see how to record the flute itself and then trying out a new spot for filming in.  My new favourite spot to go on weekends to relax and be wild again. In the video you’ll get to see my resident bunny and two of the resident crows that have a nest in one of our trees. I dearly love all our back yard visitors — there are so many!
All i need to do now is practice and think of a name for the bear flute. Any suggestions?
What have you been doing to keep busy during corvid-19 ?  Have you learnt any new skills or picked up any old ones?
Let me know in the comments. 🙂

Have a lovely night and thanks, as always, for stopping by!